Vegeta: Life's Pressures
by FreeZing.-In.-Flames
Summary: A Hilarious story about Vegeta, who is overcome with a lot of pressures on a weird journey through his life, watch as he is attacked by Zarbon, gets chased by police, his terrifying wife, fartingmoaning fat guys. Get ready to laugh.
1. Vegeta: Life's Pressures Part 1

This is the first part of Vegeta's Life Pressures, I got some nice comments on it so I decided to post it here, please leave comments, they are fairly short but they are quite good IMO.

Vegeta was walking through capsule corp pissed off.

"I CAN'T TELL WHERE I'M GOING!" Vegeta yelled going through more and more hallways.

A vein was throbbing on Vegeta's head as he slapped a doctor down and went through some more hallways.

"ENOUGH!" Vegeta yelled turning Super Saiyan 2 blasting a hole through the ceiling and flying out.

"FINAL!" Vegeta yelled in the air outside of capsule corp with the blast aiming at Capsule Corp.

"VEGETA YOUR OUT OF ALL THE HALLWAYS!" Bulma yelled.

"Oh yeah... I knew that..." Vegeta said powering down and landing.

"I hope your planning on paying for the roof." Bulma said.

"NO!" Vegeta said.

"I can't force you after all you are the Prince Of Saiyans." Bulma said.

"Exactly." Vegeta said proudfully.

Bulma pulls out a frying pan.

"But the Frying Pan Of Doom might be able to change your mind." Bulma said smirking.

"O-Okay honey I-I'll p-pay for the r-roof just please don't hit me... again..." Vegeta said curling up into a ball.

"Good." Bulma said.

The ground started shaking all of a sudden.

"Is it a Earthquake?" Bulma said.

Hundreds of people came running down the street yelling monster and they turned the corner and they were soon gone and Piccolo approached capsule corp.

"Nope it's just Piccolo walking through town again." Bulma said.

"Hey Vegeta Goku wants to fight you, in the plains." Piccolo said.

"Yes finally another chance to---" Vegeta's sentance got caught off as Bulma grabbed him by his ear and dragged him towards a job interview place and he was crying and squirming as Piccolo simply watched as the poor helpless Prince of Saiyans gets dragged into a hair salon.

"Pathetic." Piccolo said and walked away.


	2. Vegeta: Life's Pressures Part 2

Okay I know the parts are short but I've gotten some very nice comments from people, without furthur adu, Vegeta Life's Pressures Part 2 Please leave comments.

Vegeta: Life's Pressures part 2.

Chi Chi came into a hair salon and froze up, seeing Vegeta with blush on and fuming with rage behind the counter.

"Umm... Vegeta?" Chi Chi said.

"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU WANT?" Vegeta yelled and Chi Chi ran off and Vegeta inexplicably got fired.

Vegeta walks through town and see's a store with soap on sale buy one get one free so he goes in.

Vegeta see's noone and goes back outside.

"Would you help me across the road young man" The old woman said.

Vegeta had a vein throbbing on his head but agreed to do it.

Half way across Vegeta saw someone in the store and ditched the old lady in the middle of the road and ran in the store as you could hear HONK HONK sounds and a yell.

Zarbon quickly puts on a mask that looks exactly like the store keepers face, the store keeper is knocked out though.

"Hello would you like to buy some soap? 99 cents for one, you get the other free." Zarbon said still in his costume.

"Sure!" Vegeta said handing over 99 cents.

"Excuse me but there is tax." Zarbon said.

"How much?" Vegeta said.

"One dollar and 98 cents." Zarbon said.

"THAT'S FOR BOTH THE SOAPS! YOU YOU RIP OFF ARTIST!" Vegeta yelled kicking Zarbon in the shin and he runs out of the door.

"Security!" Zarbon yelled as Dodoria in a guard suit chased Vegeta.

Vegeta soon had a bunch of Police chasing after him but Vegeta ditched them and ran back into the soap store.

"Well we will make it more fair this time, 2 free, only pay for one." Zarbon said.

Vegeta payed 99 cents with no tax.

"Enjoy the soaps, they will be your last." Zarbon said and chuckled.

Vegeta saw the old woman, still alive, somewhat. But little did Vegeta know the soaps had time bombs in them!

"I'm sorry for letting you get run over by cars, here have these soaps." Vegeta said.

Zarbon's eyes widened and Vegeta started walking away as the old woman exploded.

"Well that was very rude! I give her soap and she explodes!" Vegeta said.

Vegeta walked thoughtfully down the road as Zarbon prepared a huge stink bomb and was about to send it out of a small shack.

Zarbon pushed it but it wouldn't fit through the door! Zarbon yelled as it exploded inside the hut and you could hear a huge farting sound and Vegeta was too deep in thought to hear it.

"I'm the damn Prince of Saiyans! I'll go take money!" Vegeta said running in a bank and blowing it up and he took all the money and ran back to capsule corp.

Bulma meanwhile was pist off.

"WHY IS THE POLICE IN FRONT OF OUR HOUSE!" Bulma yelled.

Vegeta shrugged and got hit with a frying pan.

"TELL ME!" Bulma yelled and Vegeta curled up in a ball.


	3. Vegeta: Life's Pressures Part 3

"Umm... It's Halloween!" Vegeta said but got hit with a frying pan.

Bulma screamed as Vegeta made up an excuse.

"Umm... I got to do a star wars reenactment?" Vegeta said.

"You wanna help Vegeta?" Goku said.

"Why the hell are you on my property!" Vegeta said.

Vegeta looked at Goku in a Luke Skywalker uniform, then Bulma with the frying pan of doom and the police and he followed Goku quickly.

Piccolo was sitting in the directors chair and Goku put a Darth Vader costume on Vegeta.

"Action!" Piccolo yelled.

"Ummm... I am your father?" Vegeta said reading the script.

"No!" Goku yelled.

They started fighting and in slow motion Goku struck his lightsabre down towards Vegeta's hand.

"Dammit! This isn't the Matrix go normal speed!" Piccolo yelled

"Oh yeah." Goku said going at normal speed again hitting Vegeta's hand with no effect and he kept hitting it.

"What the!" Piccolo yelled.

"Ummm... we got plastic lightsabre's cause we wanted a non violent movie and cause they were on sale, well mostly cause they were on sale." Trunks said.

"This is pissin me off!" Vegeta yelled.

Yamcha comes in as the Dark Lord and Vegeta tosses him down the pit.

"That was the sewage/waste pit you moron!" Piccolo said.

"Oh yeah... I knew that..." Vegeta said.

Goku sighs and grabs a knife and cuts off Vegeta's hand.

"AHH MY HAND AHHHHH" Vegeta screams.

"It's an effect." Goku said.

"Oh yeah..." Vegeta said.

"Ummm... what next?" Vegeta said.

"We have to go get the Sith Lord --" Goku said.

10 minutes later Goku comes up the ramp up from the waste pit patting the Sith Lord's back and he's covered in waste.

"I LANDED IN LAST NIGHT'S CORNMEAL!" The Sith Lord said.

"There there." Goku said.

The Sith Lord gets back up and Vegeta tosses him back down and Goku.

"Stop tossing everyone down the damn waste pit!" Piccolo said as Vegeta tossed him down and ran out.

"Let's see, I've got the police, the soap guy, my wife, Kakaroto, The Namek and a few others after me... THIS SUCKS!" Vegeta yelled.


	4. Vegeta: Life's Pressures Part 4

A cop spots Vegeta.

"OH CRAP!" Vegeta said running into a school.

A bunch of children are in uniforms looking sad as a mean old hag teacher is teaching.

"HELP ME!" Vegeta said.

"Who are you? And how dare you interrupt my class!" The Teacher yelled.

The teacher took a cue stick and Vegeta put one arm out.

"Look lady, I can fry you, what you got there is nothing as I am---" Vegeta's sentance got cut off as the cue stick broke over his head.

"OUCH!" Vegeta said turning the teacher into a fried hole.

The kids jump off tear their uniforms off into some drug advertising clothes and they press a button and a wall breaks down into a cocaine factory.

"OO;;;;" Vegeta said staring.

The cops ran in and looked at Vegeta and shot at him.

Vegeta ran for his life into Zarbon who is fried stinky and hurt.

"I'VE BEEN CHASING YOU FOR 3 HOURS! ALL I WANT TO DO IS ANNIHILATE YOU! BUT DO YOU CARE? NO!" Zarbon says sobbing into his hands.

"HUMAN SHIELD!" Vegeta yelled.

"WHAT!" Zarbon said as Vegeta grabbed Zarbon and put him up as a shield as bullets penatrated his "shield".

"Get em!" A bunch of cops yell.

Vegeta runs and runs into Piccolo and Goku who are dripping with gunk and toxic waste.

Vegeta turns towards an alley as Bulma walks out with a frying pan of doom.

Vegeta looks left, right, and behind him, he goes to run forward but Dodoria blocks his path and they walk towards him.

"No! NO!" Vegeta yelled.

Vegeta screamed as foam dripped from his mouth and he woke up from a dream sleeping in a white room.

"Just a dream." Vegeta said and sighed.

Vegeta leans up tries to move his arms but can't! He struggles but looks at the white room and the straight jacket he's wearing and he starts foaming at the mouth and biting the wall.

"Welcome to the Happy House!" A voice says.

Vegeta spazes.


	5. Vegeta: Life's Pressures Part 5

Heh, haven't updated in awhile but okay.

Vegeta screams.

"I'LL SEND YOU TO THE NEXT DIMENSION YOU BASTARD!" Vegeta screamed.

Vegeta has a vein throbbing on his head as he struggles to get free but can't.

Multiple days later...

Vegeta looks like hell, bobbing back and forth, wheezing.

"M-My best friend is b-big footie... we hop down the marry r-road... and... these guys in the white lab coats... they are cool too... hehe... they bring me to the happy house... sing a marry tune la la la la! Then when I leave... I will hop through the marry rainbow with the leprichauns and big footie... hehehee... THE WHEELS ON THE BUS GO ROUND AND ROUND! ROUND AND ROUND! ALL THE LIVE LONG DAY! MOO MOOO! MANY MANY COWS! OINK OINK!" Vegeta yells insanely.

Vegeta smacks his head against the wall repeatidly.

A knock is on the door as Goku slowly enters, following Gohan and Goten in his formal school uniform.

"Umm... Hi Vegeta!" Goku said.

"GET OUT OF MY LABORATORY DEE DEE!" Vegeta screamed at Goku with foam spraying from his mouth.

"...That's from Dexters Lab..." Goten said.

"NOOOOOBODY ASKED YOU!" Vegeta said.

Goten backed up slowly.

"MOO!" Vegeta mooed. "Group hug!" Vegeta added.

Gohan slowly backed up. "Umm... no thanks..."

Vegeta's eyes turned bloodshot as he hissed.

"THE SATANIC RINGS OF EVIL WILL COMPELL YOU! DIE BITCH DIE DIE DIE HEHEHEHEEHE I WILL DEVOUR YOUR SOUL!" Vegeta screamed at Goku Gohan and Goten.

Vegeta started waving his butt in the air as everyone backed up slightly.

"He's cracked..." Gohan said.

Vegeta stopped. "RAAAA! COCOA PUFFS!" Vegeta said diving at Goten.

Goten yelled and dodged and Vegeta hit his head on the wall going unconsious.

"Well... he didn't need that... he already took a bit too many hits to the head... well let's drag him outta here." Gohan said.

"Right." Goku replied, picking Vegeta up.

They blasted a hole in the ceiling and flew out.


	6. Vegeta: Life's Pressures Part 6

Continue with the comments, thanks XD.

"The wheels on the bus go round and round..." Vegeta said twitching.

"Riiiight... you'll be okay Vegeta." Gohan said.

They flew him to Capsule Corp and set him down on a table.

"What seems to be the problem?" The doctor said, they all realized Vegeta was gone.

"WH-Where's Vegeta!" Goku yelled looking around.

Goten ran around looking.

"Bulma's husband Vegeta? He's here?" The Doctor asked.

"Yes and we need to find him!" Gohan said.

"Well... I can't perform an operation if it's not serious." The Doctor said.

"But it is!" Goku yelled nearly.

"Prove it." The Doctor said.

Suddenly, Vegeta flew in with a jetpack on his back, smashing a hole through the ceiling with underwear on his head trying to pull them off as he flew around like a maniac.

"THE UNDERWEAR IS EATING MY HEAD!" Vegeta screamed flailing his arms as he smashed into things exploding them as he flew down a hall.

"... Riiiight..." The Doctor said "Go get him and we'll perform an operation..."

Goku, Goten and Gohan went out on a chase for Vegeta. Goten entered a dark room and saw a pair of red eyes.

"H-Hello?" Goten said slowly.

The eyes lunged at him as Goten screamed and ran down the hall.

"IT'S GOING TO EAT ME!" Goten yelled running down the hall as Vegeta chased him with bloodshot eyes and a trail of foam following Vegeta.

"What the!" Gohan said as his brother ran past him.

Goku had a flashlight throughouly searching the building with no success, he suddenly walked past the cafeteria and saw so much food... his eyes glimmered as he dropped his tranquilizer rifle and dived into some food and ate to his hearts content.

Gohan saw Vegeta and shot tranquilizers into him with no effect as Gohan just tossed the gun at him but it had little effect. Gohan then screamed and ran after Goten trying to catch up.

"Why is Vegeta wacked!" Goten said.

"How should I know?" Gohan said.

Gohan raises an eyebrow, thinking as Goten looks at him.

Gohan pulls out a manuscript and reads it.

"Oh Laura I love you so much!" Gohan hands Laura's part to Goten.

"I love you too?" Goten says.

Vegeta hisses at the thought of romance as they continue angering and weakening Vegeta.

Goku comes out of the cafeteria with a huge stomach.

"Look who I met!" Goku said as Scooby Doo and Shaggy come out.

"Dad help!" Gohan yelled.

Goku picked up a sheet of paper as they read some drama/romantic things as Vegeta fell over.

"Finally!" Goten said.

They wrap steel chains and locks around Vegeta and carry him to the Doctor's Room and they throw him on a table. They chain him up to the table and put some restraints to the table.

Vegeta soon awakens and tries to break free but as a safety measure they add 20 more pounds of chain around Vegeta.

"Time to operate!" The doctor said.


	7. Vegeta: Life's Pressures Part 7

Another part fools.

"OH MY GOD! DON'T OPERATE ON MEEEHEEE! BULMA TRIED ONCE! I DON'T WANNA LOSE MY SAIYAN PRIDE!" Vegeta yells in horror as a blade comes down to him.

Everyone facevaults.

Vegeta turns SSJ2 and breaks out of the chains.

Zarbon meanwhile is outside with a plasma ray hooked up, and he smells like garbage waste and looks like hell.

"I'll exterminate you one way or another, Vegeta." Zarbon said.

Zarbon shoots a plasma ray at Goku turning him into Pizza.

"What just happened---" Goku paused and looked at himself, screamed and started eating himself.

"Dad! Stop you're eating you'reself!" Gohan said restraining him.

"No really it's okay, I mean it hurts at first... but you get used to it... plus I taste GOOOD!" Goku said.

"Come on we gotta fix you Dad!" Gohan said.

"Hey this is MY fanfiction!" Vegeta yelled.

"Oh well we have to fix my dad!" Goten said.

Zarbon shoots a plasma rifle at Vegeta, but it misses, skimming the back of his pants off though.

They all quickly run out of the door so they can go to a doctor as they run down the street. Little does Vegeta know, his behind is showing and people are staring at him.

A dog bites Vegeta's behind.

"OUCH! MOTHER BEEP BLOOD BEEPIN HOLY HELL!" Vegeta said screaming.

"Ummm..." Goten said.

Goku gets away from Gohan and runs and starts eating himself.

Zarbon shoots a giant plasma rifle at Gohan but it misses again and hits a plant turning it into a huge live murderous plant.

"Uh oh..." Zarbon said.

Goku continued running.

"Hello, I see you are interested in this house, you look like real west siders, which tells me you'll love this house." A Landlord said, guiding a man and wife outside of a house.

"FREEDOM YAY!" Goku screams and runs past the house.

"Was that... a giant peice of pizza...?" The man said.

"Yeah uhh... Pizza is a favorite around here! It uhh... comes to you're house so you can eat!" The Landlord said worried.

The murderous plant, only 2 yards away so it can easily be seen has the top of Gohan's head in it's mouth.

"OH MY GOD! IT'S EATING MY BRAIN!" Gohan screamed as the plant roared and swung him around.

Zarbons ray blows up multiple cars as a cow grows huge and explosions richochet.

"Yeah... as I was saying... you guys look like you would like a house... 10 miles away..." He slowly said walking away with them.

Vegeta ran by with the dog biting his grrr.

"NO! MY BEAUTIFUL BEHIND! DAMN YOU MUTT! DOWN FIDO DOWN!" Vegeta yelled.

"Why do I have such wacked friends and family..." Goten said walking away.

See what happens next time!


	8. Vegeta: Life's Pressures Part 8

Another part of Vegeta: Life's Pressures!

Vegeta ran through the town screaming.

"DON'T. EAT. MY. grrr!" Vegeta yelled.

Vegeta ran up some stairs, stomping so hard he fell through, they were cement.

The dog fell off and ran.

"Hmmm..." Vegeta said.

Vegeta turned SSJ2 and tried to squirm free but couldn't.

Vegeta shook his head and yelled.

Meanwhile...

Gohan kicks the plant and it spits him out. Zarbon runs and Gohan heads out to find Goku.

3 days later.

"H-Help!" Vegeta said still stuck in the stairs.

Gohan stepped in something and it yelled Ow!

Gohan looked down and Goku was sitting there, in pizza form. Only his face was showing, he ate his body. Goku licked around his mouth and bit his lower lip and at it off.

"Gohan, be a sport and give me that pepperoni above my eyelid." Goku said.

"D-Dad! You ate yourself!" Gohan said.

"Yay!" Goku said.

"Even if we heal you all that will be left is your head!" Gohan yelled.

"Relax... just get me a senzu." Goku said.

Gohan gave him one and Goku got his body back, his pizza body that is.

"YES!" Goku yelled running off eating himself again.

"NOOOOOOO!" Gohan said running after him.

Vegeta was crying as a group of people walked on him down the steps.

"FINE YOU WANT--- step A PEICE OF ME? step RAAAAAAA IS THAT ALL YOU GOT! step step step, Vegeta foams at the mouth RAAAAA Vegeta swings his head around and foam flies everywhere'

Suddenly a huge fat bum starts to sit down.

"NO NO NO!" Vegeta screamed as the fat guy sat on him and ripped one.

"UGH!" A muffled scream came from under the fat guys grrr.


	9. Vegeta: Life's Pressures Part 9

Another part!

Zarbon hopped off his machine groaning.

"Dammit! It didn't work!" Zarbon said.

The plant was swerving behind Zarbon and it started eating him.

"AHH MY BEAUTIFUL HAIR!" Zarbon said getting flung around.

Meanwhile...

Vegeta was screaming still as the fat guy was eating a bean taco.

FAAAAART!

Vegeta paused then kept screaming.

"I SWEAR IT IF I GET OUT FROM UNDER HERE I'M GOING TO UNLEASH HELL! YOU CAN'T MOCK THE---" Vegeta paused as the fat guy farted, groaned, then scratched his grrr.

Five hours later...

Gohan kicked Goku as all was left was Goku's waist up, he was hopping and eating himself.

Gohan grabbed him and gave him a senzu, then dropped a special drop on him and he turned Saiyan again.

"NOOOO!" Goku screamed falling on his feet crying.

"Uhh dad..." Gohan said.

10 minutes later.

Vegeta is crying under the fat guys grrr as three more fat guys came along and were eating pizza and farting and groaning.

"Stop it... please... I've been enhaling flatculents all day!" Vegeta cried.

All four rip huge ones all at once.

"I don't think that was just a fart." The fat guy sitting on Vegeta said.

"AHHH NO NO NO NO!" Vegeta moaned.

FART!

They kept farting for 10 minutes. The fat guy sitting on Vegeta got up and took his pants off and put them over Vegeta's head and got new pants.

"AHHHHHHHH" Vegeta said shaking them off.

Days later.

Vegeta looks like hell, he is moaning and the fat guys are farting.

Meanwhile...

The gigantic monster plants are rapidly growing and they are spreading.

People run as plants try to eat them, one picks up a car and throws it at someone.

Meanwhile outside of town...

Behind Gohan and Goku are giant plant heads coming out of the distant city and buildings are blowing up and falling down.

Goku is kicking a rock.

"Goten went off and we still need to find Vegeta... hmmm..." Gohan said.

Suddenly... Goku looked around and saw Goten sleeping looking kinda beat up in some grass.

They went up to him closely then they heard...

"Crickey! This is the Son Goten, they casually eat a lot and are cute!" Steve Irwin said.

Goku facevaulted and Gohan grabbed Goku and whipped him at Steve Irwin. Gohan grabbed Goten and Goku and flew off, looking for Vegeta.

"FOR THE LOVE OF GOD HELP ME!" Vegeta said as HUGE farts were blasted and groans came.


	10. Vegeta: Life's Pressures Part 10

Another part then! Rejoice!

"GIMME FAAARTS" Vegeta said going insane.

Fart, fart.

"YESSSSS" Vegeta said.

Another day passed and Vegeta was singing and farts roared.

Goku walked down the sidewalk and stopped.

"Gohan look!" Goku said pointing to Vegeta.

They walked over to him and Gohan started choking.

"UGH! IT SMELLS" Gohan yelled.

Goku kicked the fat guys and they bounced away. Gohan took some air freshener and sprayed it everywhere.

"Kakaroto?" Vegeta yelled.

Goku slowly pulled him out of the ground.

"I WENT THROUGH HELL! THEY HAD BURRITO NIGHT! OH MY GOD!" Vegeta said.

"I'm going home..." Goten said leaving.

"Well... uhh---" Vegeta paused.

Zarbon ran by screaming.

"RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!" Zarbon yelled.

The killer plants followed Zarbon. One saw Goku, Vegeta and Gohan and lunged at them.

They started running.

"Go go go!" Goku said.

They jumped in a mini van and started driving.

"Uhh... Dad... why don't we just fly..." Gohan said.

The plants were catching up.

"Quick we need to lose some weight!" Goku said.

Goku whipped off the head lights, the doors, the back door. It started going faster.

"Just a little more..." Goku said.

Goku grabbed Gohan and whipped him out of the car and the plant started eating him. The car went faster and Goku and Vegeta got away.

"AHHHHHH!" Gohan said slowly getting eaten.

They drove then they stopped. They saw Zarbon on the curb.

"HAHAHA I GOT TWO CANNONS ON MY RAY GUN! DO THE MATH! AND THERE IS TWO OF YOU!" Zarbon said.

Silence passed by.

"What's Math?" Goku asked.

Vegeta shrugged looking completely stumped.

Zarbon sighed and just started blasting them.

BAM BAM BAM BAM!

Goku front flipped over the shots.

Vegeta laughed and kicked a shot away.

Goku praised Vegeta but got hit by a laser.

Goku turned into a waffle.

"I hate waffles!" Goku yelled.

Vegeta laughed but a ray hit him. Vegeta turned into a pink pony.

"WAAAAAAA!" Vegeta said.

"One more shot will neutralize you forever..." Zarbon said.

He prepared the shot but the giant plant hit him and his machine and Zarbon got dragged away.

"Damn you aaaaaalllll!" Zarbon yelled as his voice faded.

"What now! I hate waffles!" Goku yelled.

Goku sniffed himself. "Emm... Blueberry... but still!"

"Shut up! Look at me!" Vegeta yelled.

Vegeta stood up on his hind legs and wacked Goku with his hooves leaving hoof marks on his face.

"Ouchies!" Goku said.

"RAAA!" Vegeta yelled.

Vegeta dived at Goku and they started fighting.

"EAT BLUEBERRY!" Goku said yanking a blueberry out of himself and exploding it across Vegeta's face. Vegeta smacked Goku with his hooves.

What will happen now! Will they turn back! Will pretty horsey Vegeta turn back! Will Waffle Goku revert! Who knows! The only way to find out is to stay tuned to Vegeta Life's Pressures!


End file.
